I have struggled with my weight for at least the last 23 years. Yes, since I was 12. It honestly has probably been longer than that, but 12 is the age I remember needing a bigger size in jeans and being totally miserable while shopping.
I have been on every diet under the sun. I know this is the part where I am going to lose a lot of you because you're thinking to yourself, you just haven't found the right diet!!! Or, you can lose the weight!! I know I'm going to get messages that say things like "I was once like you! I did (insert diet I probably tried 8 years ago here) and got to my goal weight!" Well, that is great for you!! You finally lost the freshman fifteen you gained in 2003! But for me, this time around it's not a number on a scale or a particular size, its finding a way to love me as I am.
Does this mean I give up on eating better or working out? Nope. Also, If someone offered me a tummy tuck tomorrow I would do it in a heart beat. This also doesn't mean that I am committing to being a size 18 for the rest of my life, I am not the new plus size spokesperson, defending the rights of every overweight person in America. This is an incredibly selfish journey I am setting out on....
And I have kind of a hard time being selfish. I have kiddos that I happily always put first, I have a relationship with an amazing man, and work and a million other commitments that I always put above myself. And while I can't blow off packing my sons lunches for school every morning to stand in front of the mirror reciting words of affirmation for 30 minutes. I can commit to writing down one thing about my body I am grateful for and why each day. So that will be the challenge for week one. HEY! I think I just figured out the formula for this whole thing! Each week I will write about how the previous week went, and announce what I plan to do the next week.
SO stay tuned!!!
Good lord this could end up being the biggest embarrassment of my life, or it could end up being what makes my life a million times better.